What The Hell!
by InsomniaticFox16
Summary: In this story there are many different things happening. There is some language, possible sex in later chapters, so just be warned. Anyway! Please read, I believe reading the story is better than a summary.
1. chapter 1

So. I will go ahead and apologize if no one likes this. It is merely for me to not be so bored and to have some form of creative thoughts escaping my head.

However, I do hope for some readers to feel fit to inform me on how I can better my style. This is just a pilot chapter. If it gets good reviews. I will continue the story.

Anyway. Let's begin.

Clattering came from a messy house kitchen, followed shortly by grumbles and curse words that most people hadn't thought of yet. The source of this lovely noise was a female, about 5'3 who had dark red hair which was mussed up from the stress of cleaning. She wore loose cargo pants that were dark blue in color and a tight grey tank top. Her upper arms and upper back were adorned with tattoos of star signs, tribal symbols, pagan ritual symbols, and an out of place wolf on her right shoulder blade.

Due to the effort she was putting in to clean she didn't hear the soft pattering of feet on the hardwood floor as she put yet more dishes into the dishwasher. She put the last dish into the washer of dishes before quickly turning around in time to see a blur of black and green tackle her and lift her off the ground.

" _Heeyyy_! _Ansay_ _**Senpai**_!!!" A gravely voice yelled with energy only a teenager could muster. He was a rather large boy, standing at six feet tall and three inches. He had short and messy black hair with a green Mohawk pattern down the center. Paying attention to his features would show silver eyes with a blue hue to them. Along with a scar, light though it may be, going down his right eye to the jaw line just below. He had a hint of black stubble on his chin, which held a scar that lay horizontally. His shirt was loose but despite that you could see the muscle that was built just beneath the thin fabric. His thigh muscles held his jeans in place, despite him being relaxed. He was a rather hulking teenager.

"Hi Conner." She patted his head softly as he sat her down, him leaning over her barely to look all around the kitchen. With a soft sigh, the girl walked to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of Goldschlager. With a swift movement she opened it and poured half its contents down her esophagus. "What can I help you with little brother?" This named earned her a grin that showed perfectly white teeth, some appearing to have sharp edges on them.

" _Well_. _Artsy sent me over here. She said there was an emergency. She was freaking out a bit. Her parents are out of town. She said that was a good thing._ " Ansay nodded slowly and put on her steel toed boots, which appeared like regular tennis shoes. The next thing she grabbed was a black plaid over shirt. As she walked to the front door, she grabbed things off shelves; her phone, wallet, knife, gun (which went into a hidden holster on her side.) After grabbing these items she grabbed her keys last, let Conner out, and followed swiftly behind him after closing and locking her door. She wasn't going to take her car since she had just gulped half a goldschlager and didn't want to put her baby brother in harms way.

They walked side by side down a dirt road, walking about the same pace and soon arriving at a gravel driveway that was about a 15 minute walk away.

She could already hear clattering coming from inside of the house and she wasn't even at the door yet. Letting out a sigh, the maroon haired woman walked to the door, not bothering to knock, she walked in. Within seconds she ducked as a throwing knife flew past her head, almost hitting Conner in the chest.

" **Hey!! What the hell!!?** " The young boy yelled before running into the house, his eyes showed anger that he hid fairly well underneath his calm demeanor. As swiftly as the knife had been thrown, appeared a man with many piercings. He appeared behind Conner, a kunai in hand and aimed at the boys neck. His arm came down in a swift motion and nearly hit before a loud ringing sound could be heard from near Ansay, she holstered her gun and slowly walked towards the man. " **Mind telling me why the hell you just tried that bullshit?"** Her voice was low for a females, filled with a menacing anger that no one could even think of messing with.

On closer inspection she noticed his ringed eyes, obviously all the piercings, messy yet spiky orange hair and that he wore loose black pants and a tight grey Tshirt.

" **Well! I asked you a question!** " She glared and got closer, pulling Conner behind her and standing between them.


	2. I'm not drunk enough

In all honesty, let's be fair. Ansay hadn't thought this through. She just followed her instincts, which led to a bullet being gone, the man before her having a burned streak across his knuckles, and said man glaring at her.

"I asked you a question." Her voice came out just as confident as before, only anger showing in her eyes. The red haired man took a step back, looking at his hand before training his ringed eyes back to the small woman in front of him.

"We told the girl if she called anyone that they would be killed. I was following through with my word." His voice was flat minus a hint of obvious pain in his words. With a low sigh, Ansay grabbed the guy's arm and off pulled him around, "Bring me to Arsty. Now." She growled low in her throat, showing no sign of backing down. The man paused for a second, his free hand seeming to want to draw another weapon but deciding it to. He had no clue as to why he was cooperating with this small woman. Let alone not killing her. It wouldn't be that hard, right? The last boy thing different about her was that her energy level seemed to be higher than the other two. It was close to theirs but she had no chakra.

With a soft sigh, he lead her down to the basement. They were greeted by a group of men and one woman. The woman had shoulder length blue hair and orange eyes. She wore clothes similar to the man's, just tighter pants and lighter in color. The other men had nearly all the same clothes on, just a slg that variation in color. Ansay lurched forward to the girl in the center of the. She had messy white and brown hair, her eyes were closed. She was fairly small, being only about 5' tall and rather slim. She had a tattoo on her inner left ear of two blue dots and a silver necklace with a pagan symbol carved into a pewter pendant. The girl was bound to a chair. One of the men tried to stop Ansay from untying her but got kicked in the jaw. It hurt far more than he thought it would, not knowing her boots were steel toed. His silver hair was now disheveled and he growled, "What the fucking hell bitch?!" He stood, rubbing his jaw as the crimson haired girl untied her friend, pulling the smaller girl into her lap and checking her over. She took off her own plaid long-sleeve over shirt and wrapped it around the girl to keep her warm.

"Answer me. Now! Why the **FUCK** was she tied up!" Conner came to kneel beside Ansay, gently taking Artsy and running upstairs with the small girl in her arms.

"She is 16! What the hell was she going to do to you!" Ansay was very clearly pissed, anger rolling off of her in waves, causing most of the group to take a step back. Save for the silver haired, foul mouthed bastard, the orange haired man, and a man with a mask over his face. Her face became lax for a split second, her eyes flickering with realization.

"You all are the Akatsuki?" She tilted her head, her hand rested on her pistol as she put one foot back to brace herself, this movement not being not viable because of how faint it was. The orange haired man nodded and stepped forward. "We don't know how we got here. We woke up in the basement." He gestured to their current surroundings, earning a grunt from the woman. The other men were tensed, mainly the silver haired one, who had a dagger out and ready to attack any second. "I'm Pein. I am the leader." At this Ansay looked at the man with an orange mask, her eyes rolling.

With a soft shrug she relaxed, turned towards the stairs, and proceeded up. "Come on." Her boots barely made a sound on the concrete basement steps, the door stood open from their prior entry. Prob watched her for a moment before following behind her, the rest of the group followed shortly. Taking the cue from their leader and just going with it at this point.

They arrived upstairs and made it to the living room. "You won't be staying here. Her parents are strict as all hell. So you will be coming back to my place." Her crimson hair was more messed than it was before, Pein just noticed how she twisted a few strands around her fingers, tugged, ran her hand through. Basically made it a tangled mess that still looked fairly neat.

Conner sat on the couch with Arsty sound asleep in his lap, her skin had a soft tan hue, it wouldn't be noticeable unless you knew her natural skin color. She grumbled in her sleep before stretching and waking up, as she yawned you could faintly see thin and sharp canines almost like a cats. Her eyes were normal, being a dark brownish gray in color. She started to shiver, curling up tightly against Conner and letting out a soft nose that couldn't be described.

Ansay walked over and gently picked her up bridal style, holding the small girl easily. "If you want to argue with me. Wait till we get to my house. Then take out all of your anger." She headed out the door, stopping as Hidan jumped in front of her.

"I don't know who the fuck you think you are. But I'm not _**waiting**_ to kick your ass." In a split second his hand came up with a kunai held in his fist. He slashed across, barely missing Ansay's face as she jumped back slightly. He kept slashing, doing it fairly wildly as he wanted to draw blood. With soft huffs, the crimson haired woman kept dodging. She pulled Artsy closer to her body to keep her from getting slashed with the razor sharp knife. Hidan jumped forward, aiming for Artsy as he did so, the kunai glinted slightly. Ansay ducked down, getting slashed across her cheek, her body curled over the smaller girl's frame. A large man stepped forward, he had a mask that covered the lower half of his face. He stood taller than Conner and had a far broader frame. "Hidan. Stop this." His words seemed like they were empty but that there was a hidden threat for Hidan somewhere beneath them. Hidan ignored him and slashed again, nearly stabbing into Ansay's back but being stopped by a hand that was connected to the masked man's body. It was connected by tendrils of what seemed like thick, black thread. The hand held the zealot up by his throat, seemingly effortlessly. "I said **stop**." The large man walked forward and slammed his fist into Hidan's face, earning a groan of pain as he did so.

"I apologize for my teammate." The man nodded slightly, pulling the lower part of his mask down. "I'm Kakuzu." With his still attached hand he helped Ansay up, who checked Artsy over for any injuries. "Thank you."

She nodded slowly and looked at him for a second before standing up. Blood trickled down her right cheek, staining the collar of her tank top. Kakuzu brushed his finger across her cheek, earning a low growl and pulling away. Not like he was afraid. Almost like he didn't want to scare her or make enemies. "Let's go. And keep your **bastard dog** in line." She glared at Pein for a second before walking out the front door, it was extremely hot out. As soon as they got outside they had sweat dripping down them. "What the hell? Who wants to walk in this!" A blonde man groaned as he begrudgingly followed the woman and boy.

"Shut up, Deidara." A short, red haired boy (?) spoke back to him. His voice flat and seeming to be unaffected by the extreme heat. Deidara groaned in a whine like fashion and slumped over as he walked. "But Sasori-Danna. It's hot." He grumbled and pulled off his shirt, earning an eye roll from Hidan, who was still being carried by his throat by Kakuzu.

Ansay kept twitching at each whiny remark, not wanting to yell because Arsty had just gotten back to sleep.

They arrived back at her house, which was rather large for it to be just her and Conner. There were two floors to the house, appearing as if there were three bedrooms just at the front part of the house. It resembled a large log cabin with no garage, in its place was a bonfire area. Logs lay side by side like seats around the pit, a brown dog lay sleeping beside one of the logs. As they approached, the dog stood, ears perked and eyes trained to their approaching forms. The dog barked loudly, its bark being deep despite it appearing as a puppy. Conner ran forward and met the brown dog, picking it up as he did so. "Hey Spud babygirl!!" He received welcoming licks all over his face, the puppy squirming in his arms to get free. He gladly let her go and watched as she ran straight at the group. Barking and wagging as she did so, about two feet away she jumped forward and landed on to the blue haired woman. "I'm sorry. She's very friendly." Ansay glanced back as the woman was stunned for a second before petting the friendly creature who was now lavishing her in welcoming licks.

"No it's okay. I haven't had a dog in forever. Let alone pet one." She smiled and held the puppy, petting Spud's head. They followed Ansay inside, arriving in a large living room which held two couches, a loveseat, and a recliner. On the wall that the main couch faced was a large flat screen tv, held up above a brick fireplace. The walls were painted a light blue and were adorned with a few choice art pieces. Mainly of wolves and dragons, a few foxes and eagles. They all let out a collective sigh as they each walked in, feeling the cool air. It felt wonderful in here compared to outside. Without being told to do so, a few of the men walked to a piece of furniture and dropped into it, breathing sighs of relief. Pein, Sasori, and Kakuzu were the only men left standing, Sasori seeming to not be bothered by the heat. The other two seemed to ignore it, if that made sense.

The crimson haired woman gave Artsy to Conner, who fairly swiftly brought the girl upstairs. She then turned to look at the group sitting in her house. "Okay. Now talk. How did y'all get here?" She watched each of them, waiting for a response. Soon the red haired, young looking one stepped forward.

He looked in her eyes, studying her for a second and noticing that she didn't back down from his emotionless gaze. "We were in Amegakeru. In the base there. I heard a yell come from the entrance and went to see what it was. I figured Deidara, the idiot, had blown something up again." At this Deidara stood up to yell some form of an insult but was silenced by Konan covering his mouth. She sat back beside him and made him follow her lead.

Rolling his eyes at this, Sasori continued to speak. "I got there, along with the others, and there was just a cloud of smoke. Then everything went black for me." A few others agreed with this, nodding or verbally responding. "And then we appeared here." Sasori motioned in the direction of where they came from, watching as Ansay nodded then walked to the kitchen. She came back with a bottle of Bacardi Black Rum, opened it, chugged half of it. This earned strange looks from some of the members, mainly surprise that someone so small could handle so much alcohol. "Are you okay..?" The orange masked man asked in a fairly childish voice, slowly moving towards Ansay.

"No. I'm not." She replied softly, rubbing her forehead as she leaned on the wall, obviously stressed over something. The man continued to slowly walk forward, kneeling in front of her and tilting his head. She caught glimpse of the sharingan behind the singular hole in the mask, ignoring it for the time being. "What's wrong?" He asked softly, seeming to show actual care for the woman standing before him. At this question she downed another few gulps, as if the burning as it went down didn't exist. She let out yet another sigh and looked directly at his eye. "Honestly?"

He gave a small nod, wanting honesty from her. Seeing as he could probably kill her in less than a second, and she seemed to know this but didn't back down. He felt a slight bit of respect for her so he wanted to check.

"I'm not drunk enough for this." She groaned and finished the bottle, tossing it into the trash and walking up the stairs. "Alright. Blondie! Kakuzu! Hidan! And wherever plant boy is. Come here!" She stood about halfway up the stairs, waiting for the ones she called to follow. The plant man appeared out of the floor and looked at her oddly. "How did you know we were here?" He tilted his head, his voices seeming to speak over one another in the act of finishing a sentence. "You make nose in the floor. It's kind of obvious." She pointed to a few small cracks that seemed to be where he had been under. The other three soon appeared and followed her up the stairs. "Alright. Zetsu I'm assuming?" At this she earned a nod from the Venus flytrap man. "You can stay in here." She pulled out a key and unlocked the door, showing a fairly normal room. The walls were grey, the carpet was soft and dark blue. There was a queen sized bed in the center of the room with gray sheets, a dresser to the left, beside a small bathroom, and a desk to the right beside a small closet. Zetsu walked in and nodded slightly, walking around the room and becoming familiar with the smell of everything that was in here. The scent of flowers was faint, almost like a rose candle had been burned in here. He went to thank her, but before he could she was gone and the door was left open.

Hidan, Deidara, and Kakuzu followed he quietly, looking at the walls as they approached another door. "Here you go fuck face." She glared at Hidan, who glared back just as fierce. He huffed and went to shove past as she unlocked the door. This earned a rather odd come back. She opened the door, hooked one of her ankles between his legs, thus causing him to topple over. Then she walked into the room, stepping on him as she did so. His back now had footprints going vertically along his spine, and even on his head. "You can say thank you." She growled low and went to the bathroom, unlocking it. "Enjoy your stay." She left, closing the door behind her.

Hidan got up slowly and looked around, taking in a breath he noticed the scent of roses. He seemed to relax before shaking it off and exploring the room. It appeared almost exactly the same as Zetsu's except the wall was grey, still, and the carpet was maroon colored. The bed had blue sheets and blankets. The desk was beside the bathroom and the dresser was next to the closet. He took off his clothes and hopped on to the bed, melting into the comfortable mattress.

Since Ansay was bringing them to their rooms, she decided to show Kakuzu's to his next. She unlocked the door to show a room with white walls and light brown carpet, the bed was king sized as opposed to the other queen sized. It had burgundy sheets with a red comforter, the pillows being burgundy as well. The desk was larger, the bathroom was larger, the dresser was in a corner and taller than the others. It just appeared as a larger room than the other she had shown to them. He nodded a thanks before walking in and closing the door. He walked to the desk and took out his money to count. Leaning back with his legs propped up, relaxing as he counted, his hood and mask taken off and thrown onto the bed.

Deidara was the last one to be shown a room out of this group. So she took this time to show him to the small art room that was near the back of the second floor. "Here. You can come in here whenever you want." She handed him a key to the door and pointed to it. "Go look. Enjoy. That's your room." She motioned to the door across from the art room, unlocked it, and waved as she went back down the stairs.

The blonde watched her for a moment before unlocking the door and walking in. He relocked the door behind him, walking around and noticing all of the art supplies. From clay, to paint, to wood, almost anything you would need, including a standing easel. He sat down in a comfy chair and pulled a bag of clay towards him. He felt the mouth on his hand open as he picked up some clay, molding it into who knows what. He felt a smile come to his face as he relaxed for the first time, truly, since they had arrived.


	3. I'm sorry

I want to apologize in advance. I know this is picking up slowly. But during the next chapter there will be plenty more that happens. Also! There is a possible trigger in here for those that have been in the military. I apologize. And Semper Fi

Ansay's emerald green eyes were trained on the stairs as she was lost in thought, the sound of ritualistic soft chanting brought her out of it. She looked to see what room she was passing and banged her fist in the door. "Hidan! If you get blood everywhere I will kick your ass!!"

This earned her an irritated grunt in return, but the chanting stopped for a second.

After waiting by the door for a few seconds, she walked down the stairs. Making her way into the living room she walked to the couch and gently put her hand on Konan's shoulder, seeing that Spud was still in her lap. Konan looked up and barely smiled, playing softly with the the sleeping puppy's ears. "Yes?" Her amber eyes showed curiosity and trust, her body being fully relaxed despite barely knowing Ansay.

With a gentle smile, the crimson haired woman sat down beside her, her hand resting on Spud. "I have rooms for the rest of you whenever you are all ready to go." Itachi looked up at her and nodded slightly, going back to looking through a book beside himself. Ansay assessed the others, leaning back as she did so. Sasori was to the other side of her, looking around to learn his surroundings.

"So. You're alone, right?" The blue haired woman asked, truly curious about one small woman having. Well basically a mansion.

This earned her a slow nod from the woman being spoken to. "Sort of. Conner lives with me sometimes. So does Artsy and our two other friends." Konan slowly nodded as this processed in her mind, "How old are you?"

Ansay looked at her for a second, petting spud slowly as she did so. "I'm twenty-one. Why do you ask?" She looked Konan over for a second, pausing to look at her lips before trailing her eyes down to memorize the rest of her body.

"How can you afford this if you're so young?" The amber eyes showed real confusion, and by this point the rest in the room were listening.

"I was in the military. For three years. Marines to be exact." Her sentences were slow as she spoke, almost like it was a hard subject to talk about.

"What happened?" Sasori was the next to speak up, looking at her and watching her body language.

"I was deployed to another country. While I was there my comrades and I were sent to check out a possible terror base. We went in." Her voice started to shake as the images played in her head, the screams of her teammates. The yelling, gunfire, explosions, the blasts of light, spray of blood. It all flooded back, causing her muscles to tense as this happened. "We heard talking from the back of the place. Myself as the head, I went in first. Stag was behind me. Then there was Copper, Trigger, and Crypt." Her jaw clenched more, breathing uneven as her eyes started to sting from tears wanting to come out. "I was the first in. Then I heard Crypt yell from the back 'Ambush!!' But it was too late. There were fifteen of the guys there. The room in front of me suddenly exploded, followed by screams from inside the room. They killed their own men to kill five of us." She shifted in her seat, waking Spud who immediately turned to lay in her owner's lap. Nuzzling her hands and licking softly, gentle whines escaping her. "I turned in time to see three of the enemy take down Copper, he went hard though. He wasn't about to let them have him without taking them. I saw another few come out. I shot two of them but then I got shot in the shoulder. Crypt was grabbed, one of them put him to his knees, going to basically execute him. Stag saw this and was close enough that he tackled the man, so our brother only got scratched by the bullet." Konan gently rested her hand on Ansay's arm, rubbing softly to try and comfort in some way. She could see the effect that re-telling this was having on the younger woman. She had heard how bad war was and had even been in it. But hadn't seen someone react this way, not with so much anger and hate towards their enemy.

"To sum it up.. Copper got killed first. Shot. Took three with him. Trigger was taken second. Had killed four of them when he got killed. Stag was the final to die.. He took out two more that were after Crypt. I would have died.. Crypt was new. He was the youngest. He hadn't seen war yet. So he froze. He only killed one. I killed the last four, standing between them and Crypt." At this point she stood, pulling her shirt off. What appeared to be burned holes showed on her abdomen; one through her left rib which came out beside the right side of her spine. The next was her shoulder, like she said, it went straight through her right shoulder blade if it had been on the left it would have gone through her heart. She then pulled her jeans down slightly to show a large gash scar that went from one hip to another. "Being a woman in the military is hard because you get taken much faster for information."

She sat back down, pulling her shirt back on, resting her hand on Spud again. Konan was slowly nodding then quickly wrapped her arms around Ansay, hugging her. "I'm sorry that your friends died." The other woman didn't respond, instead she just held onto the blue haired female and breathed in.

Pein was watching the young crimson haired woman, hearing all the words she just said over and over. "How can you afford this house?" He spoke softly, watching her reactions. "I got the Purple Heart. I was wounded in battle and protected my last man with my life. So the military basically pays for all of this." She smiled slightly and looked down at a bracelet they hadn't seen before. It was a small, silver chain that had a pendant hanging from it. The pendant was about the size of a dime, had a pistol across it and the devil dog as well. "It's from my team. We each had one before we deployed. They got Buried with theirs." She sighed softly and got up, looking them over "well. Who wants to see their rooms?"

All but Sasori stood up, so she took them upstairs and brought them to their rooms, having to bring three of them to the main floor and show them their rooms.

She arrived back in the living room and sat beside the red haired puppet master. He looked over at her, slowly running his eyes over her body. "You're not a puppet anymore?" Ansay spoke in a soft voice, motioning with her head to the lack of hinge lines. A small smirk made its way to the puppet-master's lips as he nodded. "That's true."

He leaned close to her, noticing how she did not move away or flinch. She looked into his eyes, seeming to tense as she listened to the others in their rooms.


End file.
